Struggling a bit

I am struggling a bit.

Daily life consists now of me trawling job sites and helping my husband with application forms. It gets tedious especially with no job in sight yet.

You can’t take a day off from it because it is sod’s law that will be the day that the right job appears somewhere.

He goes to interview and gets great feedback but that is not a job and that is what this family needs.

The Job Centre are “helping” him by sending him on a very basic computer course that will enhance his job prospects not one bit in my view. He was working on computers when they were huge beasts and has stayed up to date as he is really interested in all things ICT.

So he is on a full-time course this week which just happens to be Half Term when I could do with his input.

All the poppies everywhere just feel like salt in the wound. We are in trouble because the Royal British Legion decided to get rid of my husband, a former service man as it goes, who had served them loyally for 7 years whilst recruiting other staff to do jobs he could do stood on his head.

We are both getting a bit down about it and that can lead to tension between us. I found out a woman at his work turned up to see him especially to say goodbye and that resulted in an argument between us. He has time for things like this whilst I am slaving away.

Every morning I wake up with the thought “What can I do today to help my husband get a job?” Nothing has worked so far and when you hear one job had 450 applications you do wonder if there is any hope at all.

Even when I got the all clear at the breast care clinic last Monday, the thought “Now I will live my life to the full!” was closely followed by “Oh no, it has to go on hold till my husband has a job sorted”

I know there are people with much bigger problems and that we are not alone with this one. There is so much unemployment and I still find it strange that the Legion have added some ex-forces people to that number.

Poppies are everywhere and I even feel robbed of that because I don’t think I will ever wear one again.

I know from past experience that I will find a way through this and of course, blogging it out always helps a little.

5 thoughts on “Struggling a bit

  1. I hate reading this. I feel like yiure carrying the world on your shoulders again.
    I really hope something comes along soon and that everyone notices how much you are actually doing for them xx

  2. I’m so moved – I have so been there. Not with the same challenges you face but in thinking that my life was on hold until this problem was sorted. But the thing is – your life isn’t on hold and doesn’t have to be. In fact, breaking out of thinking about it like that will be the best thing you can do to help yourself survive this tough time. As you say – you got the all clear – that’s to be celebrated. Try and put all the bad bits of life in their own compartment, and open the drawers where all the good bits reside and focus on those!! I am sure there will be good bits! It’s stopped raining for one and a walk is free! Family love is free! Your husband is free – some have to do life on their own, some as single mums. I’m not trying to sound trite or belittle your challenges. I just wanted to offer some love and support even though I don’t really know you! All the very best and may it change for you soon. xxxx

  3. What an awful, awful situation for you both. It’s just impossible just now, there are so few jobs out there. Would starting something be an option? Or consulting work? Sounds like he has lots of experience that people could tap into. I hope things look up for you soon.

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